


Love, Hard To Find (At Least In These Situations)

by GoldenHero



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band), SEVENTEEN (Band), VIXX, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, M/M, Mental Hospital AU, Munchausen by proxy, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, vixx red velvet characters appear breifly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-26
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-02-07 08:05:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12836862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenHero/pseuds/GoldenHero
Summary: Lee Jihoon has spent his entire life working to protect his family, but after he escapes from a dangerous situation he is put into a mental Hospital and learns that love is real, even if it is hard to find.





	1. Chapter 1

 

“Jihoon-ah!” 

 

Jihoon flinched as his mother’s screeching voice sounded through the small trailer house, her footsteps making the weak foundation shake. He got to his feet, blinking a bit until the black dots disappeared from his eyes and moved out from his shared room. 

 

It was night, and darkness had already fallen. Seokmin was out getting beer for their mother, the damn druggie. Jihoon was already dressed in pyjamas and had just tucked Chan in for bed, covering his ears with headphones to block out the sounds of possible sounds that his mother might make. 

 

He didn’t want Chan to be hurt, and doing this seemed like the only option. 

 

“Y-yes, mother?” He said softly as he approached. His mother was hunched over three bowls of soup, a fine line of powder covering all three of them. A cigarette was between her fingers, and occasionally ash fell into the food but she didn’t seem concerned about it. 

 

“Take the dinner,” she snapped, putting the bowls on a tray and handing them to Jihoon. Jihoon nearly dropped the tray under the weight but bore with it as he moved back to his room, listening to his mother groan as she took another drag of her cancer stick.

 

The trailer that he and his family lived in was not up to scale by any standard, with discarded syringes covering the floor with empty beer bottles and bottles of medication that belonged to no one in the house. 

 

Jihoon knew that his mother wasn’t well in the head. She fed them poison every day in the forms of powders, soaps, and crushed up medication. It was horrible poison, but Jihoon knew that if he didn’t eat it, his mother would brand more crosses into his skin to make him behave. 

 

His younger brothers didn’t seem to know of their mother's actions and even idolized her as the greatest mother ever. Jihoon had figured it out when he found his mother putting crushed up pills in his morning porridge. 

 

She had convinced him with whispers that she was helping him, curing him of an illness and ridding their bodies of demons as she pressed a cross into his hands and murmured the word of God that she poured into his ears. 

 

After that, Jihoon found himself falling out of faith for the God he had once trusted his life in. Seokmin had been next to find out what their mother was doing, but instead of punishing him the same as she did to Jihoon, she let Jihoon take the blame. 

 

In the end, Jihoon had two crossed branded into his back just behind his shoulder blades. Indents that she fit crosses into to remind him of what he had done and what he was saving his brother from. 

 

He looked down at the bowl of soup, seeing the white flakes slowly dissolving and felt his tongue be heavy in his mouth. He hated this, he hated that he was helping kill his brothers in the name of a God that his mother tainted the name of.  

 

“Jihoon?” Chan’s soft voice made Jihoon’s eyes flicker up. The small boy was sat on the bed, his eyes wide as he looked at the food that Jihoon was holding. 

 

“Is it already dinner?” He asked. He was seated on the small bed, wrapped in a large blanket which clung to his incredibly thin body. His face was sunken in and he had dark rings under his eyes. He was dying. 

 

Jihoon looked down at the food, seeing his own sunken in face reflected in the soup. He had had enough. 

 

“No, Chan,” he murmured, going to the window and tossing the bowls out, ignoring Chan’s cry of protest. “We need to come clean.”

 

He knelt down before Chan, taking his hands that were so cold and so small into his own. He squeezed them, bowing his head to kiss them in some sort of apology as tears stung in his eyes. 

 

“Our mother,” he murmured, “she...She isn’t well.”

 

Chan made a noise of confusion, “then she needs some medicine, right?” He asked. 

 

Jihoon looked up at him. Chan looked so innocent, so confused. He was poisoned and sick and dying. And it was all Jihoon’s fault. 

 

No, it was all her fault. 

 

“No, Chan,” he whispered, pulling his younger brother into his arms. “This isn’t an illness that medicine can cure. She’s sick in the head. You haven’t seen it, but Seokmin and I have. She’s been feeding us poison all our lives.”

 

He took a deep breath. 

 

“She’s killing us.”

 

Chan was silent, his hands clutching at Jihoon’s thin pyjamas. Jihoon could feel him shaking, may it be in fear or shock, but Jihoon pressed on. 

 

“As soon as Seokmin gets back, we’ll formulate a plan. If Mother asks, we ate dinner. When she goes to bed, we have to leave, okay?”

 

Chan stared at him, his eyes wide in terror, “we’re leaving?” He repeated, his voice moving to a whimper. 

 

Jihoon nodded, “it’s for the best. She is killing us. It’s better for all of us.”

 

A sound at the bedroom door made the two of them jump and look as Seokmin poked his head through the door. 

 

Jihoon remembered when Seokmin was smaller, his cheeks still puff with baby fat. It had been seventeen years since he was born and fifteen since Chan was. Seokmin had lost his tan complexion and was nearly as pale as Jihoon. He was thin and small and horribly malnourished. He had stopped eating entirely to avoid the poison. 

 

“What’s better for us?” He murmured, closing the door and locking it behind him. 

 

Jihoon patted the ground next to him, letting Chan curl into his arms. Seokmin took a seat next to him, leaning on him with a wheezing sigh. Jihoon carded his fingers through his limp greasy hair. 

 

“We need to leave,” Jihoon murmured, “we’re all dying at the hands of that woman, and I don’t want to be buried in her front yard like a fucking animal. After she falls asleep, we need to leave.”

 

“Where would we go?” Seokmin asked, “we don’t have money, a job, an education,” he trailed off with a soft cough. 

 

Jihoon patted his head, “I’ll drive. We just need to get as far away as we can.” He watched Seokmin’s face carefully for any protest but found none. 

 

“If it means we’ll be safe from her, I’m willing to do whatever it takes,” Seokmin replied, squeezing Jihoon’s bicep in a comforting way, “she’s going to bed now, taking a few of her sleeping pills. If we’re quiet enough, we can get out easy enough.

 

The police station is ways away from here, if we can convince them that she has been hurting us, we-” 

 

His voice cut off when a sharp knocking came on their door. Jihoon froze, his grip tightening on Chan as he felt the younger start to shiver in fear. 

 

“You little shits!” Their mother’s voice screeched through the door, her fists pounding on the weak door frantically. 

 

“Don’t think I don’t hear you shits talking! I’ll gut you before you can fucking think about leaving!”

 

Jihoon’s heart began to thud horribly in his chest, he got to his feet and pulled Seokmin with him, “get out through the window. I’ll try to hold her off, get to the truck and wait for me,” he whispered, pushing Chan into his arms. 

 

Seokmin pulled Chan close, watching Jihoon for a moment before he opened the large window and jumped out. He held out his arms, pulling Chan out of the window behind him, carrying him to the beat up pick up truck. 

 

Jihoon turned back to the door where his mother was still screaming, slamming her fists into the door as she ordered him to open the door. 

 

He took a deep breath and opened the door. His mother stood at the door, her thin blonde hair was messy and long, her face was curled into a horrible sneer that made her wrinkles bend and curl in horrible ways. 

 

She looked horrible, eyes red and bloodshot and scars from all of the drugs she took marked her skin. She was a horrible mother and seeing her like this didn’t make him feel any pity for her. 

 

“You go past the word of God,” she snarled, grabbing him by his hair and forcing him to his knees, “kneel before me and beg for forgiveness from Him!” She roared, tugging at his hair until it felt as if it would tear at the roots. 

 

Even though it hurt so much, he didn’t scream. He didn’t whine or whimper, he wouldn’t give her that satisfaction. 

 

“Apologize to me and I’ll spare you the pain of burning another cross into your back,” she snarled, tugging him and forcing him to look at her. 

 

Jihoon stared at her, tears coming to his eyes as he tried to breathe past his horror. He took a deep breath and took hold of her hand, tugging her down to his level and forcing her to the floor. 

 

“I’m not going to let you do this to me or my family anymore,” he spat, throwing her to the ground. She stared up at him with shock, her mouth falling open revealing cracked yellowing teeth. 

 

“I hope you burn in hell, bitch,” he growled before jumping over her and rushing into the kitchen. Drugs still sat on the kitchen counter, dust that settled between empty cans of soup and other things that she had used to poison them since Jihoon was a mere child. 

 

He grabbed the keys from the counter and rushed out the door, not bothering to look back at his mother screamed at him in fury. Seokmin was helping Chan into the trunk of the car as Jihoon approached. 

 

“Watch out!” Chan screamed, pointing behind Jihoon as he struggled to open the door. He looked up and watched in shock as his mother ran towards him, a butcher knife in her hands raised above her head. 

 

He stumbled backwards, the key in the door and door unlocked, she ran forward and slammed the knife embedded in Jihoon’s hand, coming through the other side of his hand. Blood spurting onto his face and chest. 

 

He screamed in agony and stumbled back, knife still in his hand. With a cry of pain, he tore it out of the appendage and slammed it into his mother’s shoulder. She stumbled back with a high pitched cry of pain. 

 

He grabbed onto the handle of the door and wrenched it open, stumbling inside and sitting down in the front seat. He started the engine with a start. He looked up to see his mother stumbling to her feet and watching him as he backed the machine into reverse and took off down the road. 

 

He didn’t look back as he drove, his hand pounding in pain as the truck rumbled down the road with reckless abandon. He glanced in his rear-view mirror at Seokmin who was hunched over Chan’s quivering body. 

 

He looked back to the road, hand slick with blood as he drove down the road. 

 

After some time, houses instead of trailers came into view and Jihoon found himself dodging cars as the truck wailed down the road. After some time, police cars began their trail behind him. He exhaled shakily and pulled over, leaning against the steering wheel as his head throbbed with pain, the blood-loss making him loopy. 

 

He faintly heard someone opening the door and felt his body being pulled out of the truck, groaning in pain as his bleeding hand was squeezed. 

 

_ “Fuck-call an ambulance!” _

 

_ “What the fuck happened here? They all look half-dead!” _

 

_ “You’re Lee? Like Lee Mina?” _

 

Jihoon groaned and opened his eyes, blinking slowly as he looked up from where he was lying on the ground. A paramedic was standing over him, his lips moving and his eyebrows pinched in panic. 

 

“Lee Jihoon? Can you hear me?” His voice was muddled and soft. Jihoon moaned and turned his head to the side as vomit curled in his stomach. He puked, spewing blood and vomit onto himself and the ground. 

 

“ _Fuck_ -okay. We’re getting you to the hospital, okay? Just stay awake! Do not fall asleep!” He ordered, but Jihoon couldn’t help the heavy weight on his eyelids. With a moan of pain and another choking gag, he vomited and passed out. 

 

* * *

 

 

Seokmin watched as Jihoon vomited on himself again and pressed Chan close to him. The young boy was whimpering as police cruisers and ambulances surrounded them. People from the public looked out of their cars and the windows of their homes, watching what was happening. 

 

Blood was still pouring from the hole in Jihoon’s hand as he was loaded onto a stretcher. He winched as the rain began to drizzle from the sky, quickly drenching the brothers. Chan whimpered and curled more into his blanket. 

 

“Hey, you kids,” Seokmin looked up as one of the policemen approached them, hands on his hips. “I’m officer Ken, I need you to tell me more about why you were out here and how you are related to Lee Mina.”

 

Seokmin nodded, “c-can we get into a car?” He stammered. Officer Ken nodded, helping them to their feet. Officer Ken was tall with a long thin nose and blonde hair that flopped over in a neat style. 

 

“Follow me. Leo and Hongbin will look you over for any injuries, then we’ll head off to the hospital to Lee Jihoon.”

 

Seokmin nodded again, whispering soft words of comfort to Chan as the small boy’s knees buckled, nearly having him collapse to the ground weakly. 

 

Ken frowned at this and quickly ushered them over to a large ambulance where two other police officers stood talking to one another quietly. As Ken approached, they straightened, eyes trained on Seokmin and Chan.

 

“Load the younger one into the truck, Ravi and Hyuk can look him over,” Ken said, gently pulling Chan forward and helping him into the ambulance where Jihoon was already lying with two handsome men who were hooking him up to multiple blinking machines. 

 

Before Seokmin could look more into what they were doing to his brothers, Ken had a hold on his shoulders and was gently pulling him towards a few police cruisers. 

 

Seokmin slid into the car, curling up on the far side of the backseat and watched as Ken entered, closed the door and took out a small recording device. 

 

“Alright, can you tell me your name?” Ken started as he clicked on the recording device. Seokmin took a deep breath to steady himself. 

 

“L-Lee Seokmin,” he said quietly, wiping his nose. 

 

Ken hummed, “and what are the names of the people you were with?” 

 

“Lee Chan and Lee Jihoon,” he said, “my older and younger brother.”

 

Ken’s eyes glimmered with surprise, “really now?” He murmured, “and who is Lee Mina to you?”

 

“She is-was- my mother,” he said softly. To this, Ken looked even more surprised. 

 

“Your mother,” he repeated, “alright. Do you know what kind of track record she has?” He asked, his voice much softer than before. When Seokmin shook his head, Ken sighed. 

 

“She is wanted in multiple states for possession of illegal substances, murder, and multiple counts of child abuse,” he said slowly. Seokmin simply nodded. 

 

“You don’t seem too shocked,” Ken murmured, resting a hand on Seokmin’s. Seokmin shook his head. 

 

“She’s a terrible person. It doesn’t surprise me that she killed other people before trying to kill us,” he whispered. 

 

Ken was silent for a moment and when Seokmin looked up his eyes were wide in shock. 

 

“She tried to kill you?” Ken asked. 

 

Seokmin nodded. “Jihoon and I found out just a while ago. We knew that she had been taking drugs, and Jihoon though that our poor health was due to her having us when she was taking drugs,” he trailed off. 

 

“But we found out soon enough that she was poisoning us.”

 

“Poisoning you?” Ken prompted. 

 

“She crushed up pills and put them into our food,” he breathed, “when Jihoon found out, she,” he paused, tears coming to his eyes. 

 

He dug a cross necklace that he was wearing out from his shirt and held it up. It was stained with blood and had bits of skin charred onto it. 

 

“She used this to press into Jihoon’s skin, his back and burned him. When I found out she tried to burn me as well, but Jihoon took my punishment, he begged for it because he knew how much it hurt. He didn’t want me to feel it as he had.”

 

Ken stared at the cross in horror as if wondering what kind of mother would do such a thing to her children, but Seokmin was silent. 

 

“I’m going to need that for evidence,” Ken said, taking a plastic bag from a pouch in his jacket. Seokmin quickly handed it over, his heart clenching as Ken packaged the small item into the bag. 

 

“Do you know what she used to poison you?” Ken asked after he had tucked away the cross. Seokmin shook his head.

 

“No. Eventually, I resorted to not eating to save myself from being poisoned further.”

 

Ken nodded, “can you tell me about how you got here, and how Jihoon got hurt in that way?” 

 

“She stabbed him,” Seokmin croaked, “he told me to take Chan to the truck. When he got outside, she came after him with a knife and stabbed him. He stabbed her back, and I don’t know what happened after that, we were already trying to leave.”

 

Ken stayed silent for a moment, nodding and clicking a button on the recording device. 

 

“That’s all I needed to know,” he said. “I’ll drive you to the hospital and we’ll go on from there.”

 

Seokmin nodded. Ken smiled weakly and reached over, petting down his hair gently, “everything will be okay, sweetie,” he said softly, patting his face softly. 

 

Seokmin found himself smiling again and curling up on the seats as Ken got out of the back seat and slid into the front, a few moments later he was fast asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Chan woke up to vomit on his chin and a nurse by his side, worriedly patting his head. She brightened when she saw that he was awake and began to wipe the vomit away from his skin while also giving him a small tray.

“If you feel the need to vomit again, go in here,” she murmured. Her voice was soft and light, and her tag was clean and shiny with her name; Irene. 

“Dr. Wendy and Nurse Joy will be in here to see you soon. Your body is just reacting to all of the antibiotics we’re giving you,” she filled him in, scribbling something down on a clipboard that was set next to his bed. 

“W-where am I?” Chan croaked, his throat was burning and his mouth tasted foul. Irene smiled and tucked the blankets more into his sides. 

“You’re in the hospital. Your brothers, Jihoon and Seokmin, are just a few rooms away getting their own treatments,” she glanced at his arms, tapping at IV fluid that dripped down into his arm. 

“You’ll be hooked up for a few days, and then after that you’ll be admitted to an institution just to check for any mental problems, okay?” She asked, pulling away from his tubes and drips. 

“M-mental problems?” Chan squeaked, “but there’s nothing wrong with me!” 

Irene looked a bit startled by his outburst, even taking a small step back. “Chan, your mother had been giving you harmful substances-”

“She didn’t mean it!” Chan’s voice rose to a yell, “none of you know anything! She didn’t hurt me! She-she didn’t hurt any of us! She only wanted to protect me!” He insisted, red hot panic starting to boil in the pit of his stomach. 

He started to squirm, ripping out IV’s and tubes, screaming until his throat hurt as Irene tried to stabilize him. 

“S-security!” She yelled after a moment of trying to calm Chan, and just a few seconds later two men rushed into the room. 

Chan screeched as they came close, his hands going up to his face as he wailed. 

“Get a sedative!” One of the men spat to Irene as he held Chan down onto the bed, not seeming to even have a problem with pinning down the smaller boy. 

Chan whimpered as his IV was inserted back into his arm, crying softly. 

“I want my brothers,” he sobbed, “Jihoon! I want Jihoon!” 

His voice and struggles soon started to slow as the sedative kicked in, his chest heaved with every sob and whine he made, going lax enough for the men to pull away. 

Irene approached him carefully, her lips pursed and her pretty eyes wide. She looked a bit disheveled, her hair messed slightly and scrubs rumpled. 

“Chan, your brothers are resting, just like you should be,” she said gently, her cool hand coming down on his warm forehead with a soft touch. 

“You’ll get out soon, I promise,” she waved off the security that looked a bit hesitant, but soon backed off just enough, standing by the door just in case. 

Chan sniffled and reached up to rub at his eyes, “I’m sorry,” he blubbered, “I’m sorry, Mama.” His eyes felt heavy and his head pounded with his exertion. 

“Just sleep for a bit, Chan,” Irene’s voice dropped down to a whisper, “when you wake up, your brothers will be here.”

“You promise?” Chan slurred, blinking slowly. 

Irene smiled and nodded, “I promise.” 

Chan hummed and held onto her other hand, squeezing it to make sure that she was there until she finally fell asleep. 

\----

Jihoon watched the doctor before him as she looked over his scarred up arm. He had burn marks from cigarettes up and down his forearm as well as crosses that she-his mother-had carved into his skin. Some were fresh and some were old. 

She didn’t speak but Jihoon could see the horror in her eyes, could see the questions that she was begging to ask but didn’t in fear of triggering a memory of his. 

He was thankful for that. 

He winced as she examined his hand, the bandage was old and crusted, and when she unwrapped it new blood began to leak out. 

Neither of them spoke as she dabbed away the blood and looked at the stitches in his hand that held the skin together in delicate stitching. 

He looked away from the wound, looking around the room. It was stark white with a few crappy hospital chairs. There were large windows that looked out over the city and Jihoon found himself staring at it. 

He had never seen the city before, his mother didn’t want him or his brothers to leave the house when they started getting sick. She pulled them from school and forced them to work around the house, of course excluding Chan. She always loved him the best, but Jihoon never gave him shit for it. 

It was something he couldn’t control. He was out of the situation, he should be thankful. 

“Jihoon?” He glanced over at the doctor blinking slowly at her as she looked at him, her face displaying concern. 

“I’ve finished bandaging your hand. Would you like to talk to Doctor Wonsik about admitting you and your brothers to the hospital?” 

Jihoon nodded a bit, looking down at his lap. His hand was tightly bandaged and he could barely wiggle his fingers. 

The doctor sighed at Jihoon’s silence, “he’ll be here soon. This kind of stuff takes time to heal and I hope that at the center they’ll do you good.”

Jihoon nodded silently, his eyes still trained on his injured hand. He remembered how the metal looked as it plunged through his hand, how the blood sprayed onto his face. He remembered her wild eyes, bloodshot with pupils small pinpricks. 

She was insane. Maybe if she wasn’t such a horrible person, she could have been a better mother. 

He finally looked away from his bandages as the doctor stood up to answer a soft knocking at the door. 

She opened the door to reveal two tall men. One of them had broad shoulders and soft brown hair that curled around his eyes while the other had dimpled cheeks and side-shaved silver hair. 

“Ah, Dr. Wendy!” The dimpled man said, his smile growing as he bowed to her, “it’s a pleasure to see you again.”

Dr. Wendy giggled behind her hand, bowing as well. “It’s nice to see you too, Namjoon-sii.”

The other man bowed to Wendy as well, but instead of flirting he looked to Jihoon. “May we come in, Jihoon-sii?” He asked.

His voice surprised Jihoon. He suspected a man with such broad stature to have a much deeper, harsher voice, but he spoke with a smooth tone with slight nasal. 

“Yes,” Jihoon replied, folding his hands in his lap and sitting up. He watched as they walked into the room, Namjoon speaking to Wendy for a moment more before the doctor left the room, leaving Jihoon with the two men. 

The broad shouldered man pulled a chair to Jihoon’s bedside and sat down, folding his own hands before him. 

“My name is Kim Seokjin,” he said quietly, “Namjoon and I understand that your current living situation isn’t the best,” Jihoon snickered at this, “and that is why we want to welcome you, and your brothers, to come to our hospital.

You will be taken care of well by Nurses and Therapists and I can assure you that you will be safe there,” Seokjin said. 

Jihoon nodded, not taking his eyes off of Seokjin. He searched his eyes for any sort of malicious intent, but all he found was innocence and purity in his soul. 

Seokjin held out his hand to Jihoon. Jihoon stared at it, looking over the lines of his skin, his clean cut fingernails and taken care of hands, so different from Jihoon’s scarred and broken hands. 

“And you promise that my brothers will be protected?” He found himself whispering, glancing back up to Seokjin. 

Seokjin nodded, “I promise. You and your brothers will be safe.”

Jihoon nodded, and after a few seconds of consideration, he placed his hand in Seokjin’s. He was real, this was real. He would be safe, Seokmin and Chan would be safe. 

Everything would be alright.


	3. Chapter 3

 

Seokjin fiddled with his fingers as he looked out the window of the car. Namjoon was seated next to him at the wheel, his own fingers tapping against the leather softly. 

 

They had been sitting here for nearly twenty minutes, waiting for the Lee brothers. It was a horrible wait. 

 

When Seokjin had first heard about the case, he thought the policeman was joking. An eighteen-year-old, a seventeen-year-old, and a fifteen-year-old had been found sick, hurt, and covered in blood and vomit. 

 

From Seokjin could figure out from the recording, they had been fed drugs and other poisons all their life, poisons that their mother deliberately put into their foods to hurt them, to kill them. 

 

“What kind of mother does that?” He whispered, breaking the tense silence in the car. Namjoon’s fingers stilled and he took a deep breath. 

 

“She is one of the most dangerous people in the country,” he murmured, “she is obviously insane,” he spoke like he didn’t know what to say, or what would make Seokjin feel better and truthfully nothing really would. 

 

Seokjin scoffed. “That’s an understatement.”

 

Namjoon sighed, tilting his head down and scratching his brow. 

 

“There isn’t anything we can do know but help them to figure out what to do now. Obviously, they’ve never had a proper schooling and I doubt that they’ll trust any of the cooks at the hospital, but you have to move on from this, Jinnie.”

 

Seokjin looked over to him, his lips turned in a grim frown. “Move on from this?” He repeated, “they were poisoned, Namjoon! By their own mother who isn’t even sorry for what she did!” He found his voice rising closer to a shout, his hands curled into tight fists. 

 

Namjoon didn’t look away from the steering wheel, his own lips were pursed. It was obvious he didn’t want to talk about this. 

 

Seokjin sighed and rubbed his nose. Namjoon hadn’t come from the best family, either, Seokjin knew this, but why did he have to be so dismissive about things like this? They were still children for God's sake!

 

“Joonie, she burned crosses into their skin,” Seokjin’s voice dropped down to a whisper, “This isn’t something that I can just move away from.”

 

Namjoon remained silent, but his hands went tight around the wheel. “Seokjin, we’re not talking about this,” he snapped.

 

Seokjin swallowed thickly, gritting his teeth. 

 

He took a deep breath and stepped out of the car as Jihoon and his brothers exited the hospital. He stepped forward to them, bowing to the security guards. 

 

“Please, get in,” he said. Chan stepped forward shyly, holding onto Seokmin’s arm while Jihoon held back a bit, looking at the parking lot suspiciously. 

 

“And you two are Seokmin and Chan?” Seokjin said sweetly. Chan stared up at him, his lips parted slightly in wonder. 

 

“Are you gonna be our Eomma now?” He whispered, his innocence making Seokjin laugh softly. 

 

“No, I’m just your Nurse,” he said softly, “I’m here to help you get to the hospital and get settled, alright?” He asked. 

 

Chan nodded, although he looked a little disappointed, “are we gonna see Mama again?” He asked. Behind him, Jihoon winced a bit and Seokmin’s lips pursed, looking a bit awkward. 

 

“No, Chan,” Seokjin said, squatting down before him, “your mother was not a good person. She hurt you and your brothers, do you understand this?” 

 

Chan stared at him, frustrated tears welling up in his eyes as his bottom lip wobbled. He didn’t reply to Seokjin and instead hid in Seokmin’s chest, sniffling softly. 

 

Seokjin sighed and led the three to the car. “Alright, let’s get going. We need to evaluate you and get you your rooms, alright?” He said as he opened the door. Seokmin and Jihoon nodded soundlessly as they got into the car. 

 

Seokjin got into the car as well, glancing at Namjoon who started the car. After all three of the boys were buckled in and everyone was comfortable, they drove off into the day. 

 

\---

 

Seokmin watched the streets go by as the car drove. Chan was curled into his side and sniffling a bit. He had a few band-aids on his arms and a slew of medications in a bag that had been given to him, the same of Seokmin himself and Jihoon. 

 

All of them were hurting, and even though Chan didn’t seem to understand what was happening he was obedient enough to stay close to his brothers. Seokmin patted his head a bit, kissing the top of his head to soothe him. 

 

“We’ll be at the hospital in just a bit,” Seokjin said from the front. Seokmin hummed, concentrating on Chan as the smaller boy whimpered into his chest.

 

Seokjin and the other man were speaking quietly to one another in hushed tones, nothing that really interested Seokmin so he decided to ignore them for the time being. 

 

Jihoon’s hand made its way onto Seokmin’s shoulder, squeezing softly and when he looked over, Jihoon had that worried look on his face that he made whenever he was deep in troubling thought. 

 

“It’s gonna be okay, hyung,” Seokmin murmured, reaching up to give his hand a comforting squeeze, “we’ll get better and then we can...” 

 

He trailed off, not really knowing what to say. What would they do after they got out? Get jobs? Live normal lives? Go to school? With his mother, life like that hadn’t seemed like a possibility, but with this opportunity that was so blatantly in front of them, it lit up hope in his chest. 

 

Jihoon smiled weakly and nodded, pulling his hand away and tucking it under his shoulder. His injured hand was curled across his chest delicately as if Jihoon was too afraid to use it lest he hurt it more. 

 

Seokmin turned his attention back to Chan as the smaller boy started to squirm, picking at the bandages on his arm until Seokmin gently batted his hands away. 

 

“Don’t touch those,” he murmured, “they’re there to help you.”

 

Chan whined, “but they feel weird!” He complained. 

 

Seokmin chuckled softly, patting Chan’s head. “I know, I know, but it’s what has to happen.”

 

Chan huffed and coiled up again, still picking at the band-aids. Seokmin simply patted his head again and looked at the window. 

 

They had left the town at this point and were heading into a deeply forested area. The trees were tall and lush, with green leaves that bowed down and swayed gently with the wind. Through the gaps in the massive plants, Seokmin spotted a large white building. 

 

The hospital. 

 

His arm tightened around Chan as they got closer and closer to it. There was a large gate that surrounded it, with barbed wire at the top in small loops. There were a few people outside, patients that were enjoying the sunshine. None of them seemed to look at the car as it passed through the gates, all stuck in their own little words. 

 

Seokmin vaguely wondered if he would ever be like that. 

 

The car pulled up to the pavement and came to a stop. Seokjin stepped out of the car and opened the door on Seokmin’s side, helping the two boys out. Jihoon followed slowly, dragging his feet along as he looked around cautiously. 

 

Seokmin looked up at the hospital. It was large with at least four stories. There were large windows that peeked into large bedrooms with two beds, some of them with patients and others empty. 

 

Seokjin led them inside wordlessly, waving to the staff that appeared every once and awhile as they walked up to the front desk. 

 

There sat a tall man of impeccable beauty. His hair was a purplish blue and he had a small headset on his head as he quickly typed into a computer, only looking up as Seokjin approached. 

 

“Hey, Jin-Bin!” He said, smiling brightly at him, “are these the new patients?” He questioned, his gaze moving to them. 

 

Seokmin felt himself flushing and looking away, wondering how a person could be so beautiful in such a soft and simple way. 

 

“Yes, can you call down Jeonghan and Jun? We need to get diagnostics on them and then put them into rooms.” 

 

The man smiled and nodded, tapping his mic once, “paging Nurse Jeonghan, please make your way to base level!” He chirped before he turned back to Seokjin. 

 

“Shall I input them into the system?” He asked, already typing something down on the computer. 

 

Seokjin nodded, “yes, please. I need to meet with Jung Hoseok for a bit, just page me if you need me.” He turned to Seokmin, smiling faintly and patting his head, “everything will be fine, just stay with Taemin for a bit until Jeonghan and Jun come to get you.”

 

Seokmin nodded, holding Chan close to him nervously as Seokjin left, the other man following him quickly, the two of them speaking in hushed voices as they walked down the hallway. 

 

Jihoon shifted foot to foot nervously as they waited, Taemin continued to type on the computer, humming every once and awhile while listening to something in his comm. 

 

“Lee Seokmin?” A soft voice murmured. Seokmin looked up to see a thin man approaching. He had short pink hair that was fluffy and kind drooping eyes. 

 

“Y-yes, that’s me,” Seokmin replied, holding Chan close to him. The man smiled and bowed slightly in greeting. 

 

“My name is Yoon Jeonghan, I’m here to take you to your rooms, alright?” He said as he straightened up, his kind smile making Seokmin relax a bit. 

 

Seokmin nodded again, “O-okay,” he said, glancing at Jihoon who was nervously staring at Jeonghan. 

 

The older nodded finally, “we can trust him,” he murmured. Jihoon walked forward after Jeonghan who walked down the halls. 

 

They entered a large area that seemed like a cafeteria, some patients were sat at the tables, talking and eating. None of them looked up as Jeonghan led them around the perimeter. 

 

“This is the cafeteria, on break times or after therapy appointments you can come in here to socialize and eat. We serve breakfast lunch and dinner at designated times.”

 

Jeonghan paused to let them look at the different people in the area. A group of people talking quietly to each other at a table suddenly looked up, their eyes trained on the group. 

 

The group was made up of a red-haired man with a thin nose, he grinned at them and his lips curled into a large heart-shaped smile. He waved at them, nudging the man next to him who was looking down at a tray of food, he shoved the smiling man’s hand away and glowered up at the group. Another man sat next to the smiling man, he had short blonde hair and he was nervously looking over his shoulder as if someone was there, but no one was behind him. 

 

The other people besides him had their hoods of their jackets up over their head and Seokmin couldn’t see their faces. 

 

Jeonghan nudged Seokmin’s shoulder, “come on, we still have to get to your rooms.”

 

“A-ah, alright,” Seokmin said, and with that, they began to walk again. 

 

They exited the cafeteria and walked down a long hallway. The halls were lined with doors with a small window in the centre of all of them. Some of them were open and patients were quietly speaking to one another. 

 

Jeonghan walked until he reached a door with the number 117. It was closed and the window was dark. He unlocked the door and turned to the group.

 

“Jihoon, Seokmin,” he said, “this is your room,” he said brightly.

 

Seokmin stepped forward, peeking into the room curiously. It was a soft pale blue colour and had two twin sized beds that were made neatly. There was a small table with a vase of flowers. Seokmin walked inside and sat down on one of the beds. 

 

Jihoon followed him, sitting on the other bed. Jeonghan watched from the doorway, Chan tucked under his arm and curling into his side. 

 

“Get comfortable, okay?” He said with a smile, “I’m going to take Chan to his room, alright?” 

 

Seokmin stiffened a bit, “C-Chan’s not staying with us?” He asked, his voice high and nervous. Jeonghan shook his head. 

 

“Unfortunately not,” he said, smiling, “just stay here, another nurse will come along to help you get into uniform.”

 

Jihoon looked a bit nervous when Seokmin looked over, he nodded a bit and looked down into his lap. Seokmin watched them leave and sighed softly, burying his face in his hands.

 

\---

 

Chan trailed behind Jeongha silently, clutching onto his arm.  Jeonghan smiled softly down at him and patted his head as they continued down the hall. 

 

“You’ll be rooming with Wonwoo, alright?” Jeonghan said as they stopped before the door with the number 142. The nurse opened the door to reveal a room identical to the one they had dropped Chan’s brothers off in. 

 

On one of the beds sat a tall thin man with his face buried in a book. He looked up when Jeonghan entered, intense brown eyes watching Chan with barely hidden curiosity. 

 

“Goodmorning, Wonwoo, Mingyu” Jeonghan said, beckoning Chan inside further. As Chan entered he spotted the other resident in the room. He was tall with shaggy brown hair and was quietly leaning against the other bed, a pair of headphones on his head as he laid back, eyes closed. 

 

He was nearly breathtaking. With soft looking cheekbones and sun-kissed skin, he was the poster child of an Adonis or even a Greek god. His eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks as he slept, a phone was resting on his lap and his hands were folded over his chest, almost as if he were thinking about something. 

 

Wonwoo got up, kicking Mingyu softly until the taller woke with a grunt, cracking open an eye to look up at him. “Whazzit?” He mumbled, his mouth stretching into a yawn as he shook the sleep out of his body. 

 

“My roommate,” Wonwoo said shortly, nodding to Chan who shrunk behind Jeonghan. Wonwoo looked sort of intimidating, with his narrowed eyes and strong physique, he looked as if he could snap Chan in half just by tapping him. 

 

“Pleased to meet you!” Mingyu said brightly as he got up off the floor, showing off just how tall he was. His head was maybe two inches below the short ceiling, but he didn’t seem to care in the least, looking over Chan curiously like an excited beagle. 

 

Jeonghan sighed, patting Chan’s head. “This is Kim Mingyu, one of the trainee nurses here who is supposed to be taking care of the Lee’s,” Jeonghan’s voice gained a bit of a sharper edge, although it was full of tease that had Mingyu grinning and giggling. 

 

“Yeah,” Mingyu said, drawing out the word as long as he could, “but that’s boring! I wanna stay with Wonnu for a bit longer!” He looked back to Wonwoo who looked thoroughly unimpressed, one eyebrow raised as he crossed his arms. 

 

Mingyu whined, pouting for a moment before he brightened back up. “Well, I’ll get to them in a moment!” He then hugged Jeonghan and Chan and skipped out the door down the hall, leaving an exasperated Jeonghan and a shaken Chan. 

 

“Is he always like that?” Chan asked, forcing himself to keep his voice steady as to not betray his nervousness. 

 

Jeonghan snorted, “Nah, that’s tired Mingyu. He’s usually less clingy, but when he’s sleepy he becomes a koala.”

 

Chan nodded in understanding. Mingyu sounded like someone who was fun to be around, someone who could brighten up a room just by joking around for a bit, very similar to Seokmin who just had to smile to light up anything. 

 

Chan blinked away tears, clearing his throat and bowing deeply to Wonwoo, “thank you for letting me stay here, Wonwoo-sii,” he murmured, “I hope that I don’t take up too much space.”

 

As he stood up, Wonwoo cracked a smile. “Just call me hyung, alright?” He said, patting Chan’s shoulder gently, “come on, let’s get you into some scrubs. Then we’ll head down to the cafeteria to get some food, yeah?” 

 

Chan glanced back at Jeonghan who was smiling fondly and nodded to Wonwoo, “yes please, hyung,” he murmured. 

 

Wonwoo’s smile grew and he ruffled Chan’s hair, digging around in a small crate at the end of the bed and producing a pair of light blue scrubs. 

 

“These are Jimin’s,” he said, patting them as if to get away dust, “they might be a little big, but I think you’ll grow into them.”

 

Chan nodded, taking the clothes. “Thank you,” he said. 

 

“Don’t mention it,” Wonwoo waved him off and closed the crate, “get dressed and we’ll get going.”

 

He pointed to a door that sat just behind Chan’s bed. Chan walked over and opened the door to find a small bathroom. It was similar to bathrooms he had seen in hotels, the entire place was a shower with a small drain on the floor. A few toiletries and hand towels sat where they wouldn’t get wet. It was quite tidy. 

 

Chan quickly got dressed, the scrubs feeling cool and soft against his skin. They hung on his thin frame and he frowned. Since when had he been so thin?

 

He shook off the thoughts and walked back into the room where Wonwoo was waiting by the door. Together they walked out the door and into the hallway, down the halls to the large cafeteria. 

 

Wonwoo quickly led Chan through the tables and people, stopping by a small salad bar and loading a boat up with leafy greens and carrots, adding a few pieces of tofu and a small bowl of soup along with it. 

 

He handed it to Chan and they made their way over to an empty table. 

 

While Chan ate, Wonwoo quietly read through a book that he had brought with him. Chan smiled. 

 

Maybe being here wouldn’t be so bad. 


	4. Chapter 4

Yoongi watched the new patients as they walked past with Jeonghan. Hoseok was waving to them like an over-excited beagle, nudging Yoongi to get him to do the same. 

 

Yoongi just watched them under his fringe. They were thin, with discoloured skin and sunken in eyes. They looked horribly unhealthy and he felt his heart squeezing in sympathy. Jimin had been like that not long ago, malnourished and dying. 

 

But he had gotten better, they all have been slowly but surely. 

 

Yoongi glanced at Hoseok as the boys left, seeing the smile on his face not dropping as he leant into Namjoon, the taller man curling an arm around him and squeezing slightly. It was hard to believe that Hoseok suffered from Depression with a smile like that, but Yoongi knew that looks were often deceiving. 

 

He pushed the food over to Hoseok and rose to his feet, stretching a bit before he walked off. The patients in the halls parted, they knew not to mess with Yoongi. Hoseok didn’t look after him like he had when Yoongi had been new, nor had he asked where Yoongi was going. 

 

He was glad for that. 

 

When he had first arrived to the hospital, he had nearly killed three patients and a nurse by strangulation only with his reason only being that they were too loud. 

 

They echoed in his mind, their voices, asking him questions that he didn’t have the answer to. Hoseok had been like this in the beginning. 

 

_ “Why did you do this?” _

 

_ “Why are there so many scars on your stomach? Did you have surgeries?” _

 

_ “Why did you burn your apartment down?” _

 

_ “Why aren’t you talking to any of us?” _

 

_ Why? Why? Why? _

 

It was horribly grating to listen to. 

 

The only person who could calm him down was Seokjin. He had come in with his broad shoulders and kind smiles and didn’t hold his arms down to his sides when he panicked, rather he gave Yoongi some tea and let him vent. 

 

He turned a few corners until he reached his room, quietly opening the door and entering. His roommate, Taehyung, wasn’t yet back. He slumped on his bed, resting his head in his hands as he listened to the other patients outside his room, now talking freely to one another. 

 

He looked up when there was a soft knocking at the door. “Come in,” he murmured. The door opened to reveal Jimin. 

 

Jimin looked as he always did, his golden hair was brushing softly against his forehead and his light brown eyes shimmered in the light. His lips turned into a smile and his nose scrunched, his cheeks looked plump and were a healthy flush of pink. 

 

Yoongi smiled back, sitting up and reaching his arms out to his boyfriend. Jimin skipped into the room, closing the door behind him and crawled onto the bed, easily fitting next to him. 

 

“Hobi-hyung told me that you weren’t feeling too well,” Jimin murmured, resting his nose on Yoongi’s collarbone. Yoongi hummed and pressed a small kiss to his forehead. 

 

“Just a bit tired,” Yoongi said, “I haven’t been sleeping too well since you haven’t been here. I need to squeeze your ass at least once before I can get a good night’s rest,” he joked. 

 

Jimin snorted, huffing a laugh against Yoongi’s throat. “I know, I know,” he murmured, “but Jinnie-hyung doesn’t want us making out at all hours of the day.”

 

Yoongi whined softly and started to gently kiss at Jimin’s lips, “but if we’re not together I can’t kiss you!”

 

Jimin hummed into the kiss, “yeah, but we need to include Hobi-hyung too.”

 

Yoongi nodded. Hoseok had not been in their relationship for long, for maybe just a little over a week, and he was still shy about PDA and kissing. Yoongi wanted him to take his time, but at the same time he felt lonely, he wanted Hoseok to accept him and kiss him already! 

 

Jimin seemed to sense Yoongi’s distress and ran his fingers through Yoongi’s hair, “how about we just chill for a bit? We can head down to the kitchen and I can make you some yummy food.”

 

Yoongi hummed, nuzzling him slightly. “Maybe in a bit,” he said softly, pressing a few more dainty kisses onto Jimin’s cheek, nuzzling him slightly. 

 

Jimin nodded with a hum, “we can take as much time as you need,” he breathed, “both of us all trying to heal, we can take as much time as we need.” 

 

Yoongi nodded back, resting his head against Jimin’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. “Jeonghan brought in some new people today,” he murmured, “they looked like they had been crying. They were all so small and thin.”

 

Jimin winced at this and Yoongi knew why. When he had first arrived, Jimin had already been here for over a month. He was horribly thin, so much so that the bones in his fingers could clearly be seen, he had practically been a walking skeleton when Yoongi saw him. 

 

“Should we go see them?” Jimin asked after a moment of silence, “I know that it’s scary to be here, and I can’t imagine that they’ll all be roomed together.”

 

Yoongi nodded against Jimin’s chest, wrapping his arms around him. “Soon, but not yet,” he replied, “we can ask Jin-hyung if he knows what rooms they’re in.”

 

Jimin hummed, and the two lapsed in silence. 

 

Yoongi liked it like this. Quiet. Peaceful. He could almost pretend that he wasn’t in a hospital getting treatment for Pyromania. 

 

He could almost pretend that he was normal and not stuck inside a hospital. 

 

He grumbled as a soft knocking came from the door. “Can I come in?” Jin’s voice bled through the door, “I need to talk to you, Yoongi.”

 

“Come in,” he sighed after some time. The door opened and Jin stepped in, not even looking surprised about Jimin on the bed with him. 

 

Jin sat down on Taehyung’s bed, his hands clasped before him. “You do know why I am here, Yoongi,” he said. 

 

Yoongi nodded, “you want me to babysit,” he grunted. 

 

Jin hid his laugh in a cough and nodded, “Lee Jihoon. The oldest of the Lee siblings. I need you to watch over him for at least a month while we try to figure out how to get him to trust us.”

 

Yoongi raised an eyebrow, “what do you mean?” He asked, “shouldn’t he already trust you to some degree.”

 

Jin sighed at this. “Yes, he should,” he replied, “but Jihoon is a special case. He took care of his younger brothers for years, and when we tried to give him good, he took apart everything while looking for some sort of poison, a habit we can assume from when he was younger.”

 

Yoongi stared at Jin, his eyes wide. 

 

Jin continued, “I want you to at least help him adjust here,” he said, “it will help with your depression.”

 

Yoongi paused for a moment, watching Jin’s face closely. The therapist looked genuinely worried, so much that it made Yoongi’s heart clench a bit. 

 

“Alright,” he said, “I’ll do it.”

 

Jin visibly relaxed, his eyes softening. “Good. I’ll bring Jihoon to you tomorrow.”

 

He got up, quickly leaving the room and leaving Yoongi and Jimin alone. Yoongi sighed heavily and rested his head on Jimin’s chest once more. 

 

“I’m so fucking tired,” he whispered, “I just want to sleep.”

 

Jimin hummed, running his fingers through his hair again.

 

“I know, I know,” he murmured, “for now, let’s just sleep.”

 

Yoongi hummed again and closed his eyes, slowly falling into a deep sleep to the sound of Jimin’s heartbeat and thoughts of tomorrow swirling in his head. 


End file.
